Expanding The Horizons

Dosa

May 27th, 2020

It’s a Dosa appreciation Blog.

This is day “I-can’t-remember” of lockdown 4.0. And all I know right now is that I’m craving a Dosa. How amazing are Dosas man.

God created Humans, realized his mistake, then handed us over the recipe of Dosa so that we mortals could cope up with his will.

Dosas are the best food ever. Period.

The crispy Dosas give people hope. The tanginess of Sambhar fills life with Joy and Chutney fills colours.

One cold winter evening, after an accident, I found myself ordering Mysore Masala Dosa at Saravana Bhawan, Connaught Place.

It was Mysore Masala Dosa which flashed before my eyes when the Maruti Swift of a gabru jawan from west smooched the rear of my bike that day.

If the red light at the intersection of Block N and Janpath Road could speak, it would tell the generations to come that some wounded dude wanted Dosa then and there. But scuffles in Delhi takes it time.

One summer morning, when I was badly hungover, I walked 8 kilometres just to find the kind of Sambhar that hits my spot. And obviously Dosa to tell my body parts, everything was fine.

When… You guys get the picture. I just need an excuse to eat Dosa. Wait. I don’t need any excuse to eat Dosa. I can eat Dosa whenever I want. But this fucking lockdown. I don’t know when I’m going to get this opportunity but I find it and guzzle my precious Dosa.

Ah! The Scrumptious Dosas. The Heavenly Bites. I’m sure, I’m going to cry my eyes out next time I eat Dosa.

See you guys later.
अर्थ अपने होने का… — वेदना – समवेदना

May 21st, 2020

सिर्फ आदमी ही नहीं , रिश्ते भी आए हैं इस महामारी की जद में संवेदनाओं को भी डसा है इसने । जो पता नहीं थे भी… या महज भ्रम का मायाजाल ही था वो सब कुछ जिसे रिश्तों के खूबसूरत नाम से परिभाषित करते रहे हम, शायद ऐसा ही हो कुछ – कुछ , कही […]

via अर्थ अपने होने का… — वेदना – समवेदना
Paatal Lok – not a review

May 16th, 2020

When was the last time you remember being uncomfortable while watching a fictional story. It happened to me twice while watching the series, “Paatal Lok.” released on Amazon Prime on the 14th of this month.

Before you proceed further, let me tell you I’m not attempting to write a review. Also, My review doesn’t matter. I just want to talk about something else.

Like several others I’m also at the mercy of OTT platforms to get some good entertainment. I log in, I watch something, I either appreciate or crib depending on the situation and then I sleep. I have been blogging since last eleven years now. During these years I rarely asked someone to watch something or read something. I have mostly tried to strike a conversation. Its my basic nature.

But dude… this social media has slapped me with the opinions of another. At times I have replied out of curiosity but mostly it has gone in vain. So slowly I’ve even stopped commenting on anything.

But you know what has still not stopped, fucking information/opinion/gibberish videos/other’s opinion about those gibberish videos and what not.

This evening I was minding my own business and Bam! Comes a whatsapp forward, wrapped in a twitter screenshot, telling me Paatal lok is hindu-phobic series and one must not watch it. I deleted the message and proceeded to do nothing in this lockdown.

It happens every single day. I know what has been happening in Big Boss or Roadies and trust me, I haven’t even wanted to know about that information. A couple days ago Carryminati roasted someone from Tik-tok, I left the video somewhere around the three minute mark. Exactly five minutes later I received it’s link in a group from a cousin who apparently has seen, “the most epic shit of life” and this followed a war. Not that fucking Youtube v. Tiktok war, what does that even mean. It was status war. A bhaiya I know is a tiktok enthusiast who if I can predict accurately, has put only thousand small clips telling people to not listen to a 12th fail guy and on the other hand, I had wonderful people exclaiming how tiktokers are “hijda”, “Beti”, and what not. All those meme making Carryminati the Prime Minister we haven’t even known we needed. Meme. The meme has become the biggest Scam I’m telling you.

Man! how I used to laugh on memes. I loved memes. but then people happened. they fucking dragged it to a level which became annoying. Anything became a meme. Fake News started getting propagated through memes. Political memes,Dank memes became a tool of a narrative. A single picture has become the source of many. People agree or disagree depending that stupid picture. Kapil Sharma’s cartoon-ish caricature has started appearing under these memes which in my opinion is meme equivalent of that annoying laugh track and no-no-no-no-no sound which comes in tiktok videos. You know what I’m talking about. And guess what I didn’t even want to know about either of them.

Paatal lok is a brilliant series. I binged watched it. Damn! does this count as a review?

I saw a scene involving what a pedophile does. I was fucking disgusted to the core. I saw a woman vomiting because someone explicitly from the other religion opened his food container. I saw a Muslim character being told time and again about his community in the series as if he is on a constant trial. And don’t you fucking dare to ask me what I was doing during Kashmiri Pandits exodus. I wasn’t born.

But now here I’m, practicing the ancient teaching of minding my own fucking business. Just don’t throw your fucking ignorance on my face like a slap. If you are not prudent enough to differentiate between truth, lie, propaganda, fandom, then you should also not be eligible to slap everyone with those.

And. Not just that. It’s about everything. If your heart goes out for a certain thing/people/incidence but not for the other people/thing/incidence then I’m sorry to say but your prejudice has blinded you.

Follow the simple principle of live and let live.

See You Later, Alligator

JD

P.S. Now when I have said this much about the series then allow me to also tell you that Jaideep Ahlawat, Neeraj Kabi, Swastika Mukherjee, Abhihsek Benerjee and Bodhisattva Sharma are my favorites from the series. However, Everyone has done a phenomenal job.
Stranded on a pale blue dot

April 24th, 2020

Everything around us is crumbling. Information is coming through technologies and nullius in verba is just a line written somewhere on a board in a Victorian building.

A virus has challenged all the beliefs and the unending stupidity has defeated it(the virus) to grow exponentially.

All the chaos that has been happening is dramatically occurring here, on our pale blue dot. And we have left no stone unturned to just blow up its pieces.

Art has found a new synonym in “content” and so has the political propaganda. Religion has made its way in each recipe and is being served to the believers without any question. The always chatting, always online subject feels empty and those who feel happy must influence others to pursue happiness. Influence.

Diseases have cure, Cures face questions, and questions die at a nascent stage. Bullets are in a race with grains, and grains are out of reach of those who are stranded here on this fading pale blue dot.

Carl Sagan writes in one of his book,
“You’re an interesting species. An interesting mix. You’re capable of such beautiful dreams, and such horrible nightmares. You feel so lost, so cut off, so alone, only you’re not. See, in all our searching, the only thing we’ve found that makes the emptiness bearable, is each other.”

But who’s listening? We are just idiots drifting in an empty space, enjoying our over stay.

Love barely transcends anymore.

May we (can also be read as I) find hope again. To love, to breathe, to believe.

See You Guys Soon,

Jd
Being Married

March 3rd, 2020

Guys, there’s no easy way to say this, but I have been quite married since last one year. Family, Friends and anyone awake has been wishing us since last night. It has been quite a journey.

We traveled a lot during this year, attended uncountable functions and weddings and events, watched horrible movies, witnessed other close people biting the dust, ate uncountable Momos and Nachos, gained weight, cringed about TikTok and faught only like a bazillion times.

So, after one year of being married, all I can say is that sometimes you wake up next to a steaming cup of tea and sometimes to an empty bed space because she couldn’t bear your snoring. And one thing that I can say for sure is that we, read I/me, haven’t matured a bit. We are still figuring out this puzzle called Marriage.

Do I see anything special about this day you ask? Maybe. I’ll have to ask the missus.

Thanks for the wishes, NEFT some of it.

See ya.
Failures

February 25th, 2020

Do you fail when you realise that the thing you wanted in your favour has gone south from your expectations or you fail when you realise you have been failing since so long that you now want to make truce with whatever is easiest for you now.

I read this quote where they do not want you to lose courage because it is what make you sail through the hard times or when easy times pack its bags and leave your house.

If you’ve somehow miraculously reached here through Google or simply because I have a left a mysterious link somewhere announcing, “What to do when you fail?” And you really want to know from a random dude about your course of action then read on.

Failure is an amazing thing to look and think upon. It differentiates you from those who haven’t even tried what you have failed in. You can read the last line again to console yourself. You can lie down, maybe masturbate, or just watch the LOTR trilogy take your mind off the failures and rejuvenate yourself so you can focus again on “trying”.

Surround yourself with people who understand your goals. Try to be more positive. Share your plans with your confidants, intact whisper it directly into their ears. Don’t tell your plans for world. Don’t fall in love. Be with someone who understands where do you want to be.

And at this point if you’re wondering why are you still reading it because you were a failure because of love, then just accept the “not love” of the person you liked. People are different. Just accept the differences and move on.

See, if you’re surrounded with people, then understand they are very important because they have energies. Their energy can bring you down. And it becomes more important when your energy is down because it would be them who would gloriously pick you up and throw you again at your tryst with destiny.

And in case if you are not surrounded by the people, then consider yourself lucky and surround yourself with surround sound speakers and dance to the tunes of Bon Jovi. It’s my life.

Just hold on. Breathe. Good will happen.

P.S. Okay, maybe don’t masturbate much, it’s not as healthy as it has been shown by researchers. It’s addictive.
Jawani Janeman

February 11th, 2020

So, we went to see this movie, which could have been released on YouTube with the title, “what if the daughter Barney had was from Phoebe.”
So, why do I want to write about this movie? Because it was boring. It had its moment, but It was boring. Story was just, well, Meh.

Something which could have been a treat to watch was made unbearable because the Barney, sorry eh, Saif Ali Khan’s character felt very caricaturish, he looked unbelievably handsome but couldn’t make me feel anything. Maybe girls felt something for him but I asked them and they were bored too.
Barney’s daughter, Er…, Bedi’s Daughter is very pretty and I’m sorry I am not going to Google her name because I’m lazy. I’ll pick it up on the go, her name. My wife told me she is Pooja Bedi’s Daughter. She could be wrong but one thing is sure that I’m old.

And how much I would have hated friends if Phoebe was anything like Tabu. No offense to her, I’m one her normal fans who enjoys watching her movie. But not this one. Nah… Just No. It was boring.
I wanted to see more of Farida Jalal Ji. She was underused.

And just fuck you guys for ruining Ole Ole. Rest is just boring.
Happy Same Old New Year 2020

December 30th, 2019

Guys what’s all this new year Ka pressure Yaar?

Past one week has been all about overdose of positivity. Dude, what if someone wants to sulk in. I hate peer pressure. What if I want to sit with people I know, people I’m comfortable with, in a Rajai, drinking hot chocolate, telling them interesting facts about alien abduction. Why do I have to be somewhere in the cold, dancing to the songs I have never heard and taking selfies. As if it is not already a hard pill to swallow that, first of January is a working day.

Take all your jolly-ness and shove it up in the back pocket of your jeans. Let me be miserable.

Also, I’m changing my name to, “Hello, my name is…” Just to shake hands with people and shake head joyously and say this again and again to annoy them.

However I wish the best for you. May you be interested in what you need till the end. Happy New Year.

See you soon
Hello, My Name is…
Protests

December 16th, 2019

I wish I had that wrath in my words, you know, like Nana Patekar, which could generate emotions of solidarity among religious people. I wish I could read a couplet at a gathering after which mob throws their weapon and embrace the differences among them.

I know it may sound like that my idea of unity comes from a dramatic scene of a Bollywood movie, but trust me I have read enough to build up on that.

When I read constitution for the first time it was just a subject in which I had to score well to sail comfortably through the year. It wasn’t that time or the next time when I watched a series on how it was made or also when I read it to clear competitive examinations. But my bad that I couldn’t clear any. And then it happened… I read it again. I felt the emotions which ran through this book. I read people who cheered for the Sovereign and the Democratic Republic. And how socialism and secularism runs through like a blood in this body of the constitution. I wish I had the courage that the makers of this constitution possessed. I wish to have that hero in me who could come out tearing his shirt and change the entire scenario.

But I guess I have nothing like that in me. So, what I can do is that I can offer my legal knowledge and whatever little expertise that I have in this field. I don’t know what else to do, I feel equally helpless and I have no idea how can I help other than this. May we all find peace.
F.R.I.E.N.D.S

December 13th, 2019

My (now) wife cum roommate cum ex girlfriend cum friend, always ignored many like me when we asked her to watch friends like a boss lady, but this year, after we got married, she succumbed to the monotony of married life and started watching friends a month ago. (Peer pressure no, living at a place where everything is dead after 8 pm, Yes.)

Now like everyone she laughed, almost broke my left arm (unlike others), fell in love with the characters and last night experienced the withdrawal symptoms that millions of fans have been facing since friends finale, originally aired 6th May 2004. That day my friend was celebrating his fourteenth birthday with me and thirty others.

So, she began crying and continued for a good amount of time. Then I lied to her about there being a season 11 and then cried myself. Why this has not happened with any other show? When HIMYM ended I was more sad because of the original ending or when earlier this when I felt extremely angry at Jon Snow for not wanting it. Man I need to do something constructive in my life.

So point being, what is this special connection that people feel with these two hundred and thirty six episodes. I must consult a psychologist.

So I consulted my psychologist Mr.Google who referred me to a psychotherapy group currently working under the name of Quora. Apparently people here come to know if only they are the mad ones or there are other are too who wants to come out of the closet.
From this collective conscience I realized there are other people who felt sad or cried watching The last one part – 2.

So meanwhile I’m writing this my wife has dropped me a message that she won’t watch anything with me ever again because how I’m talking about her crying.

So this seems to be a tragic end to my wondering why everyone is so sad.

Dasvidaniya Doston.
Jd